We woke in Soligalich hotel and drove back toward the city of Kostroma. Today we were headed to Nikolskoye. Nikolskoye is a Type VII boarding school which means that children with mental and emotional challenges are housed there. Many of them have been rejected and abandoned by their parents. Others still maintain a relationship with their parents, but still they are living an orphaned life away from the unconditional love and support found in a healthy home.
The kids at Nikolskoye are close to my heart. For three weeks this summer I was their family group leader at summer camp. Roma, my translator and comrade-in-arms, and I chose to work with this group because we were told by the camp director, Nikolai, that they were the most difficult group. He was right. The first days were characterized by absent care takers and moody and disrespectful children walking out in the middle of our planned activities. Smoking behind the broken down amphitheater, sneaking out after dark, and talking back to adults in authority - this was the norm. But we kept loving them. And another thing we did... we expected more from them. One of the tragedies for an orphaned child is that people only expect them to fail. They are only expected to be a burden to society. For someone to lovingly expect that they can succeed and be healthy and whole is one of the most profound ways to minister to a child in this situation. Things began to change and strong bonds were formed. We had conversations about prayer, addiction, marriage and parenting, life goals and lifestyles.
Two stories of my time with the kids from Nikolskoye over the summer stand out to me. I share these because they made me so excited to return there just a few weeks ago.
Roma and I would spend about 45 minutes or an hour with them every evening having some down time, saying good night. We told stories and jokes, watched clips from Narnia, sang songs, and talked about our days together. The first night I simply wished them 'good night and sweet dreams' and left. A couple nights later I went for a handshake with the boys. Then a couple days later, a touch on the shoulder. Then finally, I gave some boys hugs as I left them for the night. In my first meeting, you would have thought that they would never want a hug, though it is obvious that they desperately needed one. The first night I gave them hugs good night, I noticed that some boys circled back to have another hug good night. They were so hungry for healthy affection, attention, and affirmation. This is what an orphaned child needs to survive and thrive!
One night, Roma and I went - as we often did - to catch some kids smoking behind the amphitheater (a sometimes entertaining activity for this former youth pastor and a way to catalyze conversations about good choices). As we came around the corner one night with Natasha, our son's nanny who herself grew up in an orphanage, we found two of our girls, Nadya and Ira, with 7 teenage boys from a neighboring village. The boys were up to no good. As I came around the corner, I said, 'Nadya, Ira, we've come to say good night.' They instantly left the boys they were embracing and ran to our side. We said good night and they immediately went to their dorms and to bed. Then we had a short conversation with the boys to make sure they knew that our camp wasn't their dating service. (Those are fun conversations!) On the walk back, Natasha said something that moved me emotionally and humbled me very much. She said, 'they treated you like a papa. They've never had a papa and they treated you like a papa.' Children's HopeChest exists to take the blessing of family to orphaned children living without.
It was so good to see my kids from Nikosloye... Lena, Nastya, Nadya, Andre, Sergei, Maxim, and others. They were doing well. Warm hugs and wide smiles greeted us. What a difference from when I first met them in June! Three of the girls are soon to graduate and desire to go to a tech school to learn the trade of a seamstress and tailor. However, they have no place to live upon graduation. Please pray with me that we could provide them with a safe and healthy living arrangement. If you're interested in learning more about the different ways that HopeChest supports orphan graduates, please email me.
After our too-brief visit to Nikoslkoye, we went to the Kostroma Ministry Center. We toured the apartment of some girls in our Independent Living Program, as well as enjoyed a tour of the Ministry Center. The Ministry Center is a place of holistic support and connection for orphan grads charting a course toward adult life in their teens and twenties. A pizza party and games followed. We met a young lady named Olya and her 4 month old son, Daniil (that's my name in Russian!). They seemed happy and healthy though I am certain that life as an orphan grad and single mom must be overwhelming. I pray that she has the courage to endure. Alexie and Natalia, the 'parents' leading our Young Mothers program, are taking good care of Olya and her baby boy.
Later that night, I took advantage of the opportunity to see some good friends. I get to Kostroma a couple times of year and my days and nights are often so full - so I had to squeeze in some social time. Jerry, Jim, and Greg joined me for some pizza at Druzhba (Friendship) with my dear friends Nastya, Kyrill, Dema, and Dasha. On the way we saw two young ladies who had worked with us at camp over the summer, Luda and Nadya. It was good to be with old friends and new friends alike.
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